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A day trip to a health farm

One of the worst dating experiences I’ve had was around the age of 35. I found this gorgeous guy on Jdate. I saw a photo of a very good-looking guy with a very kind face. We started chatting online which led to chatting on the phone. We talked for hours at a time. This all started on a Monday. We continued to phone each other every night that week and talk until at least 4am! Suffice to say we arranged to meet up that Saturday. Let’s call him Boaz.

Boaz said he was staying on a health farm in Surrey. He described it as very nice. Being originally a south London girl, I’m not afraid to go south of the river. (See the glossary for more explanation on this.) So I agreed to go down to visit him. I thought to myself this might be the one! After all we’d been getting on so well and he looked lovely. I really thought this was it and I had butterflies going through me. I couldn’t wait for Saturday to arrive. How could this ever be one of the worst dating experiences I’ve encountered?

Finally Saturday arrived, and it was a lovely day to boot. I took the train down to where he was staying in Surrey. I can’t remember exactly where, but this doesn’t matter for the story.

I took at taxi from the station to this ‘health farm’ which as I expected lived up to the cliché of a beautiful country mansion – not too grand, but quite idyllic. I went into the beautiful classic, oak-panelled entrance hall which extended into one of those long corridors with the classic carpet with big wooden chairs/thrones along it. So far so good, certainly not the worst dating experience I’d encountered back then.

And then he was, sitting further down the corridor. I saw Boaz, my date!

He stood up to greet me, and as he did, I saw in that very moment why, yet again, as I suspected it was all too good to be true. He was disabled. Appearing crippled from the waist downwards, he needed a walking stick to walk! Hence, staying on a health farm.

My heart sank. I now had to work out how to hide my disappointment and try to spend at least an hour with my date who I’d also travelled down for a couple of hours to meet. We chatted politely. He then took me on a little (obviously very slow!) tour of the communal areas of where he was staying. I remember it was a lovely day and I think we sat in a grand lounge with big long windows that let the sun shine through.

Certainly, in terms of disappointment this was one of the worst dating experiences I’d had. So after a while, I managed to think up an excuse as to why I had to get back to London. He accompanied me in a taxi to the station and waited with me on the platform for my train.

As we waited, tears started rolling down my face. I fought them back, but it was very hard and I’d been rumbled anyway. He noticed. It was too late! I then had to come up with another excuse as to why this was (as I didn’t want to hurt him) and also why we couldn’t date. Luckily I drew on a cliché ‘it’s not you its, me… I’m just not over my ex’. This was actually true, but obviously I wouldn’t be saying this had the circumstances been different.

So what’s the moral of this story?

Is it not obvious?! …ALWAYS ensure you see a full-length photo of someone before meeting them. Remember I’d only had a very tight head shot to go by! And to avoid, further embarrassment of asking someone to send you one, just don’t enter into a conversation with someone unless you see a variety of shots! Sorry to sound brutal but look at what happened here!

Please don’t forget to share some of your worst dating experiences you’ve had so far!

 

 

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