If you like the person it’s good to let them know by when you send a thanking text add something like, ‘it would be nice to do it again some time’ or ‘let’s go to see that film you mentioned’ etc. follow up with something you were talking about.
I always believe ‘life is too short’ so go for it, you don’t need to play it that cool. On the other hand, if you leave a message for someone, and they don’t get back to you immediately give them space, don’t bombard them with messages. This might seem obvious, but the number of girls I’ve had to tell them not to call him again is incredible. Remember he is likely to be working, in the gym and might have family commitments too.
If, however, he doesn’t get back to you for a few days, then you have your answer. The best therapy of all is to MOVE ON!
I used to have a joke with a friend of mine, we used to shout ‘NEXT’, after each failed date. ‘onwards and upwards’ as they say. I also used to push myself out on a date to get over a previous relationship!
Although in NYC it may be different (read this post) I think if you’ve met a couple of different guys at the same time then it’s good to narrow it down to one asap. If you’ve got physical with them, I think this is even more important. It’s not conducive for a long-term relationship to be going out with a couple of different people at once as it means you’re not ever committing to one, so you don’t have your heart in it fully so it can never really progress.
None of this is meant to be judgemental, just purely the best thing to do for a serious relationship, assuming this is what you want!
Another cliché, but sadly I believe also to be true, is the longer you can hold out physically with a guy the better. Men are judgemental, whatever they say, and although it’s really hypocritical, in that they want blow jobs and sex etc they also actually want their wife to be really pure and virginal. If you’re behaving in a certain way, they’ll assume you’ve either done it with different men or they’d worry if you could be doing it with them, you’d be also doing it with someone else so soon.
From a woman’s point of view, when you have sex it releases certain chemicals that make you believe you’re in love with the person. This is why women find it hard to detach which can be very dangerous if the guy is just using you for sex. It’s much harder to be rational after sleeping with someone, it really does take things to the next level. So if you’re not sure in the long-term whether you could really see yourself with the person then just don’t do it, again, what’s the point you’re wasting your own time, life’s too short!